How to Make a Million Bucks in 50 years

Hello all.  Thank you for visiting my blog this fine day.

If you have ever been a student in my class you probably have heard the lecture on making a million dollars.  Well here it is in print so that you can revisit the idea anytime you like.  It is real, but it ain't quick.  If you follow the recipe, however, you will likely be a millionaire one day.

How to Make a Million Bucks in 50 Years

1. Get a Job - Don't matter what kind a job.  As long as you are working consistently, time will make up for a big salary.
2. Open a Bank Account - Yes, you will need a checking account.  When opening an account, realize that you shouldn't being paying for it.  Most banks have free checking.  And when you open the account and they say, "Would you like the bank to cover purchases if you don't have enough to cover the cost of a purchase?"  You say, "H$#% no!" Cuz what they don't mention is that you may end up paying $32 in charges to cover a 99 cent pack of gum.  How lovely that the bank offers such a wonderful service...so thoughtful...so very thoughtful.
3. Open a Mutual Fund Account - The one which comes to mind is TIAA Cref.  I choose this one not because it is necessarily the best one.  It may be the best one...heck I don't know, but I do know that it is one which offers an AUTOMATIC INVESTMENT PROGRAM.  This program allows regular folks to start investing right away!  Most mutual fund companies require a minimum deposit to open an account.  Those minimums are typically a few thousand dollars.  BUT NOT THIS ONE...WOO HOO!  

Okay, now the steps to open mutual fund account.

• Go here.
• Click as indicated by the arrow below.

• Then click here.

This is a retirement account.  You are going to leave your money there for a L O N G time!

If you take the money out before you retire.  You will be penalized.(You will lose a chunk to taxes.) 

You see my nerds...I didn't have a teacher who told me to start when I was 18, so it was already too late when I started.  

But not you guys! Nope, you're gonna be loaded!

Anyway, finish opening your account, then...

      4.  Link the account to your bank account and choose some small amount of money to invest               (Say 100 bucks a month to start),

      5.  Choose a mutual fund - 
           Go here to figure out which one.  At this point in your life, making max dollars on your
           money is not as important as just getting started.  So pick one.  

     6.  Last step -  NEVER EVER EVER stop adding that 100 bucks a month.  And NEVER
          take out the money 'till you retire.

Here is a prediction of the kind of cash you'll have after investing just 100 dollars a month:

That's right NERDS.  You will be a millionaire!  

Go here to put in your own numbers and mess with this calculator.

"But Lawrence?", says one of the nerds "Why doesn't everyone do this?"

Because they would rather have a hundred extra bucks to buy a spota-gram-insta-snap-twitify account, or whatever you guys do with your money.

"But Lawrence?", says a different nerd, "What if I need that money for groceries?"  

Okay. I get it.  But the truth is, if you start young and you are in your first job, then you go from having zero dollars, to some dollars.  Let's say last month you made zero, because instead of looking for a job you were playing Fortnite and eating Takis, but this month you got your first job at little caesar's and made 400 bucks!!!  

No you didn't!  YOU MADE THREE HUNDRED!  

Because you are smarter than all those before you and put $100 in your mutual fund account.

Don't worry... you still have 300 more than last month. 

If you start the right way, you'll create a great habit that will eventually bring you peace of mind, give you security, and make you RICH!

That's right friends.  One day when all the other piggies homes, built of Takis and old Xbox controller batteries, are blown down by the big bad wolf (You know...Life), your home which was built out of hard work, long term planning, and years of sacrifice will stand tall as all your broke friends will ask, "Please friend, may I enter your dwelling and partake of your riches and delights."  

And you shall sit upon a golden bean bag chair with a bag of Hot Munchies while wearing a pair of YEEZY tennis shoes, and a Versace sweater and say NO!  

You should have listened to Lawrence's blog and opened an IRA through TIAA CREF and made more responsible decisions!